The Complete Cowabunga Critique

I’m pleased to announce my latest adventure in pop culture over-analysis: The Complete Cowabunga Critique. 

Paramount Plus keeps reminding me that it is the home of all things Ninja Turtles, one of the most beloved franchises of my childhood. So eventually I figured “Why the shell not? Let’s do this.” 

That’s right. I am embarking on a quest to re-watch and review the entirety of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Every show, every movie, every video game. Not the comics. Sorry, not sorry, but I want this critique to end before I die. This post is mostly a public promise to myself so that I can’t abandon the project. 

I’m going to take a unique approach. Instead of beginning with the first cartoon like any sane person would, I’m going to start with the 2003 revival series. My reasons are thus:

1 - I have seen very little of this show, as it aired when I was in college and not spending my Saturday mornings watching cartoons. Starting with something I haven’t seen before will make it more fun for me, which will also increase the likelihood of me finishing this project. 

2 - I haven’t seen the original cartoon since it aired when I was a kid. I have heard and read secondhand that it did not age well and I don’t find that hard to believe, as it was made at the height of “Cheaper is Better!” ‘80s animation. But my own memory of that particular slice of my childhood is still intact and untarnished by the truth. As I watch everything that came after, I want to savor all of the memories that they will undoubtedly trigger and record them honestly.

3 - When I do get to the original series, for good or ill, there will be big feelings involved. Even though I’m a long way from getting there, it already feels like an appropriate finale—returning to a beloved childhood memory with the unkind eyes of an adult.

So that’s the plan. I’ve got seven seasons of cartoons to get through before my first review, so it will probably be a while. But, I wrote it down and posted it here, so now I gotta do it.